The story categories outlined below are in chronological order. The oldest has a story dating back to 1830. The newest has stories about canoeing in Algonquin Provincial Park in Ontario, Canada, in September 2019. But I’m not going to tell My Stories in chronological order. I’m going to skip around. I think it’ll be more fun that way.
I’ve written a thumbnail sketch of each category to give you some background and help you decide whether you want to take a look. Here they are:
Old, OLD Family Stories: This category contains family stories that happened before I was born. There’ll be stories here about my grandfather and great grandfather. They killed themselves. One of them died in such an interesting place that he became what newspapermen call a “reader.” On a Sunday. On page one. Can’t get better play than that.
My Dad Was A Pistol: He quit school after the 7th grade and went to work. He was only five foot, seven and a half inches tall, but he took offense easily and he liked to fight. He married, well, I’m not real sure how many times he married although I’m working on it. He had eight or nine kids, not sure of that either. He was into a lot of stuff, farming, mining, manufacturing. He was broke a lot when I was growing up but in the last few years of his life he did something I never thought he’d do, and made a ton of money.
The Farm: When I was an infant my family moved from a house my Dad built on Hoke Street in Gadsden, Alabama, to a farm outside of town. After my first mother died, when I was five years old, Brother Dave and I pretty much ran wild. One of my favorites stories from that era is “Go Tell Daddy What You Did.”
Going Coal Broke: When Dad began losing his shirt mining coal he sold the farm and we moved back into Gadsden, to an apartment at 1611 Litchfield Avenue. I was nine when I got my first mouthful of poor. I didn’t like it very much.
Charlotte: A year and a half later Dad hit bottom financially and we moved to Charlotte, a move that saved my life. It also introduced me to a new set of characters, including neighbors who were former soldiers and Marines who had fought against Germany and Japan — and who told war stories.
Sea Stories: I joined the U.S. Navy Reserves when I was 17 and served 20 months aboard USS Los Angeles, a heavy cruiser. I called one Sea Story “Whose Side Am I On?” and another, “Typhoon!”
Victory Village: Donna Joy Hyland and I were married after I was released from active duty and finished my freshmen year at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill. We moved into “Victory Village,” university-owned “apartments” for married students living on that proverbial shoestring. It was a wonderful time in our lives except, of course, for “The Weekend from Hell.”
Bo, Jack, Mark, and Donna: Stories about my three sons and my wife. Donna and I have been a couple since 1959, when we were both 17. I hadn’t paid much attention to her until one day in plane geometry class she went to the front of the room to sharpen her pencil, wiggling as she turned the handle of the sharpener. I noticed.
Snowbird: Our family is scattered over 8 states but more than 60 of them have been to Snowbird, a remote hideaway, I guess you’d say, in the mountains of North Carolina. Snowbird has become the grist for many a story, like the time Brother Pop, who had been up there more than anyone, missed a turn coming up the mountain. No, no, this isn’t about the time he drove his pickup off the side of the mountain. That’s another story.
Did You Hear The One About? These are all the grown up stories that don’t go anywhere else, like “Walking to New Orleans.” Or the odd things I’ve seen at weddings. Or “How Not To Change A Tire.”
My Big Family Stories: There are not so many of these, not as many as I would like. But maybe, over time, we can fix that. We have a good start, including “Gone Missing” and the boy that Jesus loves.
Newspapering: I went to work for The Charlotte News when I graduated from high school in 1960, before I went on active duty in the Navy. The News paid me $1 an hour [$8.69 in November 2019 dollars], not bad considering I couldn’t type and considering that newspapering is not a real job. Over the course of my career I wrote thousands of stories. These stories are about some of those stories.
Thru-Hiker: I’ve hiked a little over 3,000 miles on the Appalachian Trail, including a thru-hike in 2015 from Georgia to Maine – 14 states and 2,189.2 miles — in four months, 29 days. I took up backpacking in 2009, when I was in my late 60s, hiking out west, in South Dakota [Michelson Trail], Arizona [Grand Canyon] and Utah in the Escalante River canyon. I called this category “Thru-Hiker” but it includes all hiker stories. I look forward to telling you about “The Ring.”
Down the River: Paddled 225 miles or so down Neuse River with Mike Johnson, from Falls of the Neuse near Raleigh to Oriental, N.C., on the coast from June 6-13, 2016. It wasn’t all that much fun but it sure was interesting, and memorable. Especially in the wee hours one morning when loud voices woke me up and I heard gunfire a few feet from my tent. “Are You Boys Armed?” This category will also include stories from three other rivers, the Toe, the Chattooga, and the Roanoke. I paddled the Roanoke with GRRRR, AKA Karl Smith, May 20-26, 2017, from Weldon to Plymouth, N.C., 113 miles.
My Favorites: I know right many stories, several hundred. Some are OK, some are pretty good, and some, I think, are real good — My Favorites. My Favorite stories from all the categories will be gathered here. This one is my favorite of the favorites, my Best Story.